My Dad’s Journey to Belief

I thought I’d write an update about what God did for each of my parents in the years since I wrote my testimony.  I’ll start with my dad.

***

My dad wasn’t sick a day in his life.  Well, not in the physical sense.  I don’t remember him ever having a cold or a stomach bug.  Nothing.  But there was something hidden deep inside him, something even he would later be hard-pressed to articulate, that made him turn to alcohol.  I do know that he had a quiet, expressive soul, and that combination is a hard one to deal with.

Most days of my childhood I could smell the alcohol on him, except for the days he didn’t come home.  Still, he was kind and willing to listen when I needed someone to talk to.

I left home a month or two after high school graduation. The next time I saw my dad a couple of months later he had aged more than I thought he should have. After that I didn’t see much of my parents for a number of years until after their divorce, and I was able to talk to my dad again.

When I became a Christian, I wanted more than anything for my family members to be saved and our family restored. I thought about it, I hoped for it, I prayed about it. 

Sometime while I was away, my dad quit drinking.  He’d had an experience that frightened him and made him stop.  So without the alcohol, and without my mother, we were able to reconnect.

Both of us being chatterboxes, we’d talk on the phone for long stretches at a time.  We’d theorize and philosophize about everything under the sun.  And every now and then I’d try to work into the conversation my very favorite topic – Jesus. 

My dad would be struggling with something and I’d tell him about the One who knows how to untangle life’s messes.  He’d be hard-pressed to understand something else and I’d tell him about the One who gives peace.

I ‘d talk to him about salvation, I wrote him long notes explaining the way to salvation, and his answer was always the same: “I’m trying.”

I’d tell him “Dad, you don’t have to try, just believe in Jesus.”  Still, salvation hung in the air, ungrasped, year after year.  And during those prayers I lifted up for my dad, the Lord would sometimes speak in that still, small voice, letting me know that it wouldn’t be until just before his death that he would finally receive Him.

A few years later I got a call from my aunt letting me know my dad was sick.  The worst kind of sick.  He hadn’t wanted to tell anyone for fear they’d look at him or treat him differently.  I called my dad and we had a hard conversation. He continued to work until it was impossible.

It was May, and I got another call from my aunt letting me know Dad was in the hospital.  I rushed there, day after day, and sat next to him, holding his hand. His mind was already starting to go.  He didn’t know where he was or even what year it was. I kept praying and had others praying, too.

One morning someone called, I can’t remember who, to say he’d had some kind of seizure, or something. Our assistant pastor and his wife, our dear friends, graciously met me at the hospital.

There were no more seizures, and the funny thing was, he now knew what year it was. Pastor T went in to talk with him and when he came back out sometime later, he said he’d asked my dad if he wanted to pray to receive Jesus, and my dad said yes. Grasped.

Almost immediately after that, he was a candidate for hospice.  One never knows if a hospice bed is going to become available, and if so, how long it will take.  But one opened up almost immediately, and the one God chose was perfect.

It was in a home with a beautiful garden. If there was anything my dad loved, it was gardening.  He loved the soil (don’t call it dirt!), he loved earthworms, he loved planting.  We used to say that once he was able to retire from civil service he should work at a nursery. He would have loved it.

My family, my sister and her family, and my aunt, uncle and cousin sat outside among the gardens eating together for Memorial Day while the hospice workers looked after Dad. We wished so much he could have enjoyed the beauty with us.

The next morning I got a call at 6 am from one of the hospice workers saying he probably didn’t have much longer.  I quickly dressed and drove the several miles to get there. 

I walked into the room and my cousin was standing by his bed, telling me he had just passed. His beautiful blue, tear-filled eyes were still open. I had just missed him.  Still, I held his hand again, and said, “I love you, Daddy.”

My Heavenly Father had, in a miraculous way, kept His promise.  Whatever that seizure was, God allowed a moment in time for my dad to be aware, and our friends to be there at just the right time, so he could believe in Jesus and receive Him, and I could have that assurance.  That was just five days before he stood before the Lord, washed clean of his sins, and was welcomed with open arms. The peace and joy that had always alluded him in this life was now his forever.

I think about the day I’ll see him again when nothing, and no one, will ever separate us again, and I thank my Heavenly Father for this most precious of gifts.

Eternally Grateful,

 

 

Sunday Praise and a Prayer for Focus

“But no one who belonged to Christ’s churches in Judea
had ever seen me (Paul the apostle) in person.
They had only heard that the one who had been cruel
to them was now preaching the message that he had
once tried to destroy. And because of me,
they praised God.”
Galatians 1:22-24

 

Dear Heavenly Father, we praise you.  We praise you for revealing yourself to us, for putting your Spirit in us and for giving us new hearts. You’ve replaced our hearts of stone and given us hearts of flesh, all for the sake of your holy name.  Lord, forgive me for the times I’ve let my heart get stony again. Please continually remind us to live in a way that reveals the new hearts of love you’ve given us so we might encourage, build up, and comfort our brothers and sisters, that they might praise your name, and so the world can see our hearts reflecting your love that they might turn, repent, believe in you, and praise your name.  Help us live lives worthy of your calling, to remember our purpose and stay focused on you so that through us you might bring peace to a broken and hurting world, and praise to your name.  In your name and for your glory, Lord Jesus, amen.

Soon and Very Soon…

“So teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom.”
Psalm 90:12

 

I accepted the Lord the first day, the first moment, I walked into a small church over 28 years ago, and I fellowshipped with, served with, prayed with, cried with, laughed with, and loved the people at that church for 23 years.  Many of those dearly loved people, all of them much younger than expected, have since gone home to be with the Lord.  A few of them just recently.

It’s so easy to fall into day to day living.  Waking, working, eating, cleaning, phoning, watching, doing, sleeping…  And all those things are fine. But somewhere in all the minutiae of life we can sometimes forget that life is very temporary. And very short. None of us knows when our time will come, or when the time will come for someone we love.  We take for granted that we’ll all live to a ripe old age, but we might not.  And having lost my dad and then my mother, I know that any age for someone you love is too soon.

But God knows when, and He reminds us through this Psalm written by Moses, a man who lived to be 120 years old, that life is fleeting, and that we should take great care in the way we spend each day. In every word we say, and don’t, in everything we choose to do, and don’t, we have the opportunity to honor and glorify the Lord.  

And the people who have gone to heaven ahead of us remind us to live our lives for Christ to the fullest.  We have been called for a very special purpose: to shout the Name of the Lord, with our voices, with our lives, with our love, to the whole world, and those nearest to us. 

To praise and glorify His Name by living soberly, that is, always being aware of who we are in Christ, of our supreme privilege of giving our lives to Him daily so He can love others through us, draw others through us, comfort others through us, minister to others through us.

One of those people who has gone ahead just recently was there that morning I walked into church over 28 years ago. She sat a couple rows in front of me. I had felt the presence of the Holy Spirit the moment I walked into the room, and tears were already falling down my cheeks. The worship band started playing beautiful love songs to Jesus.  The woman a couple of rows in front of me raised her hand to Him in loving praise and worship, and I knew I was surrounded by people who loved the Lord, and I knew I could love Him, too, and that He loved me. For me, after the life I’d had, that was no small thing.  

I never told her that.  But I bet Jesus is still telling her all the ways she blessed people without even knowing it.  By just loving Him, she helped others love Him, too.

We may have one more day, or thousands.  Is there any better way to spend each and every one of them than by loving Christ in all we say and do?

And for those who have gone ahead of us, yes it is painful, yes we grieve, but we remember this: “brothers and sisters, we do not want you to be uninformed about those who sleep in death, so that you do not grieve like the rest of mankind, who have no hope. For we believe that Jesus died and rose again, and so we believe that God will bring with Jesus those who have fallen asleep in Him. According to the Lord’s word, we tell you that we who are still alive, who are left until the coming of the Lord, will certainly not precede those who have fallen asleep. For the Lord Himself will come down from heaven, with a loud command, with the voice of the archangel and with the trumpet call of God, and the dead in Christ will rise first. After that, we who are still alive and are left will be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air. And so we will be with the Lord forever. Therefore encourage one another with these words.”  1 Thessalonians 4:13-18

What a glorious day that will be.

 

With much love and gratefulness,

Your Day is Coming

“So do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded.
You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God,
you will receive what He has promised. For,

‘In just a little while,
He who is coming will come
and will not delay.’

And,

‘But my righteous one will live by faith.
And I take no pleasure
in the one who shrinks back.’

But we do not belong to those who shrink back and are destroyed,
but to those who have faith and are saved.”
Hebrews 10:35-39

Maybe there are things in this life you’ve missed out on.  All around you there are constant reminders of those things others enjoy and you don’t, and maybe in this life you most likely won’t.

Relationships are gone or never were.

That opportunity passed by.

You wonder what it would be like to live a day without pain or some other sickness.

You see the world normalizing behaviors you’re tempted to, but you choose not to indulge in.

Oh, you could run after them.  You could leave the footsteps of Christ and fill your life with all kinds of things.

But you don’t.  You don’t because as much as you desire those things, you desire Christ more.

Still, it’s hard.

I want to tell you what the Lord told me, because as His followers we’re all one in Christ: “Your day is coming.”

He sees the ache in our hearts, the longing for certain blessings, and though in this life we may never see them, our Father will more than make up for it. He sees our faithfulness and our love for Him and on that day we see Him face to face, He will flood us with a reward so powerful, so eternal, so full of Himself that we will instantly forget that we ever missed anything.

All we’ll know is completeness of love and joy. We will never want for anything again, and we will forever know a freedom the world never will.

For now, we remember that if God has chosen not to give us certain blessings now, it is out of an abundance of wisdom and righteousness.  So we keep our eyes on Christ, our Redeemer and the Rewarder of our souls. And we walk by faith.

“He who was seated on the throne said, ‘I am making everything new!'”
Revelation 21:5

“Look, I am coming soon! My reward is with me,
and I will give to each person according to what they have done.”
Revelation 22:12

A New Thing

The Beauty of a Mom

The beauty of a mom is in the way she reflects the glory of the Lord.

 

She shines with His nurturing heart and gives herself away. She sees when no one else does. Her mind treasures every precious moment. She gives her attention to every call.

She smiles at every growing step, and longs to rush in at every stumble. Wisdom tells her when stand back, and when to step in.

Her love overflows the same when she smiles at an accomplishment as when she disciplines. Thoughts of her children never cease.

Whether you’re a mom of little ones or your children are grown, let us always seek to be filled with the LORD that we might shine with His glory in all we do, and our lives speak of His goodness and grace.

Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;
    but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.
Proverbs 31:30

Keep Believing

“And immediately the father of the child cried out and said with tears, ‘Lord, I
believe. Help my unbelief.’”
Mark 9:24

Twenty-seven and a half years ago I believed in Jesus Christ as my Lord and my Savior.

Since then I have had countless opportunities to believe in His love for me despite my circumstances, to believe He had a plan in the middle of confusing trials, to believe He heard every prayer, to believe He understood me in my pain, to believe He was not finished with me even when it felt like He was.

For some funny reason, it’s always been easier for me to believe in God for the “big” things rather than the smaller ones.

I knew God would provide us a place to live; I knew God would provide a job for my husband; I knew God would bless my little son at Christmas when we couldn’t.

But, oh, those countless “little” things…  When I’ve trusted in my eyes more than I’ve believed; when I’ve trusted in my understanding more than I’ve believed; when I’ve trusted in my own effort more than I’ve believed.

And I wonder how much I’ve missed out on, how many more blessings I would have had if I’d taken that same belief I had at salvation and applied it every, single time.

“Abram believed the Lord, and He credited it to him as righteousness. “
Genesis 15:6

God puts a lot of stock in belief.

It’s not about what we do, it’s not about who we are, it’s about Whom we believe.

And there is only One worthy of our belief.

If we are going to be followers of Christ, we will daily, consciously, make the decision to take the belief we had at the moment of our salvation, and believe Him for everything else.

Why would I ever believe that Christ died for the sins of a singular, unimportant, obscure little girl who lives 2000 years after His death and resurrection, called her by name, and then somehow think He forgot about her afterward?

He hasn’t, and He never will.

My belief in Him need not ever waiver.

He sees each and every one of us, and He is intimately acquainted with our comings and goings, with our every trial – big and small, with every tear, with every, single, solitary detail.

Nothing gets by Him.

The truth is, it’s a choice.  Every day we have the choice to believe in Him – to believe He’s there right by our side, to believe He’s with our loved ones, to believe He wants the best for us, to believe He’s in our futures, to believe He’s bigger, much, much bigger, than our past mistakes.

While we can’t lose our salvations, unbelief is as much a sin after we’re saved than it is before. 

The absence of belief in Christ for a particular situation will create a vacuum that’s usually filled with fear, and that can create a whole slew of messes in our wake.

Choosing belief in Christ or to be moved out of fear will determine the decisions we make and the roads we take.

I know it’s hard to keep believing sometimes when the trials seem out of control, when the world around us is a big, complicated mess.  

But keep believing anyway.

I know when I’ve stood in belief in my prayers for a situation, God has answered.  It’s when I waiver in my belief in prayer that He waits until I stand on faith in who God is – my Loving Savior – to answer me.  He desires belief because it is the pathway to our righteousness.

God knows we’re all a work in progress, though, that the sanctification of our souls is not yet fully realized, that it is what we and the Lord are moving toward.  

As with every sin, when we repent – when we turn around and do the righteous thing – in this case, choose to believe in Him, and ask God to help us with our unbelief, He will forgive us and set us back on the right path.

We then consciously walk on that path of belief, in full faith and trust in Him – in who He is, in His plans for us, in His love for us, in His grace and mercy that are continually poured out because of His goodness and faithfulness.

 

“Father, please help us when we are tempted to not believe in you.  To not believe in all you say you are.  To not believe in your love for us.  To not believe in your plans for us.  To give way to fear instead of believing in your holy perfection and your promises to us.  Please help us choose belief over fear, self, the world, or anything else outside of you.  May our constant belief in you be witnesses of your glory and power. In the Name of Yeshua Hamashiach, amen.”

Victory

“When the perishable has been clothed with the imperishable, and the mortal with immortality, then the saying that is written will come true: “Death has been swallowed up in victory.”

‘Where, O death, is your victory?
Where, O death, is your sting?’

The sting of death is sin, and the power of sin is the law.  But thanks be to God! He gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ.

Therefore, my dear brothers and sisters, stand firm. Let nothing move you. Always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labor in the Lord is not in vain.”
1 Corinthians 15:54-58

The apostle Paul wrote these passionate words in a letter to a church he founded in Corinth, Greece.  I can imagine the pleading of his heart as he wrote to encourage them to not be lured back into the materialistic and immoral world that churned around them.

He reminded them, and us, that this life is not all there is.  There is a resurrection, Christ being the first, and because of Him, we will follow.

We no longer belong to this world, and our victory is not here.  Our victory has already been won through Christ – the gift of our immortal souls and our resurrection to the next life with Jesus Christ, our Great Reward.

There is no shortage of attention-grabbers whether it’s social media, or the news, or just the busyness of our own lives.  They can suck us in, altering our perspectives from spiritual matters to earthly ones, and rob us of doing the work for which we’ve now been called.

Not much has changed in the 2000 years since Paul wrote to our brothers and sisters in Christ.

All of us who have put our faith in Christ know how difficult it can be to keep our hearts and minds focused on the Lord, especially when the world revels in sin all around us.

After all, sin looks fun, and we can feel like we’re missing out on something.  Well, we are, but nothing good.  We miss out on the consequences of those sins; we miss out on feeding our flesh but not our spirits; we miss out on a life of fruitlessness.  We miss out on leaving our faith behind.

But Paul reminds us there is so much more given to us in its place.

We have a real Christ-given hope that when our bodies die, our immortal souls will live on for eternity in the joy and peace of the presence of God.

While, tragically, those who lived for the temporary thrills of this short life will abandon all joy and peace when their mortal bodies die, and their souls will be given over to judgment and eternal death.

While we who have put our faith in Christ may have to give up a few things here, we already have the ultimate victory through the Lord Jesus Christ.

So, what do we do?  We get back to work.  We let go of the distractions of this world and stand firm in the faith, being about our Father’s business and fulfilling the calling given to each of us just as our brothers and sisters in Corinth did almost 2000 years ago.

“Let nothing move you.”

Nothing.  Don’t look to the left or to the right at what others are doing.  Don’t worry what others may say about your faith in God.  Don’t worry about what can be done to you, even if it means your earthly life, because we already have the victory.

Look to Christ and “give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord.”

The text in the Greek puts it like this: “always abounding in the work of the Lord.”  

Abounding is the Greek word perisseuō which means “to superabound, be in excess, be superfluous; to excel, abundance, be the better, enough and to spare, exceed, excel, increase, be left, redound, remain (over and above).”

If there’s anything we should strive to do with excellence, it’s our work in the Lord.

He’s not only given us life, but He’s give us an abundant afterlife.  He sees our labor in His name, and He will reward us with eternal treasures worth far more than the trinkets of this life.

 

Heavenly Father, please help us keep our minds focused on you and not get sidetracked by the world or even by fear. Help us serve you with all our hearts, with the excellence that you deserve, that through our lives the world may see your love and grace and you may be glorified in the salvation of many. Thank you for the victory you’ve given us by clothing us with immortality and preparing a home for us in heaven with you. We praise your glorious Name, Jesus, and pray it all in your Name, amen.

Sunday Praise

“God is exalted in his power.
Who is a teacher like Him?
Who has prescribed his ways for Him,
or said to Him, ‘You have done wrong’?
Remember to extol His work,
which people have praised in song.
All humanity has seen it;
mortals gaze on it from afar.
How great is God—beyond our understanding!
The number of His years is past finding out.”
Job:36:22-26